A Buttoned Button is More Than a Button

by Tricia Siudut

     The single most common question that I have been asked is, “what can we do at home to support what our child is learning in the classroom.” It is a wonderful question and I am delighted by it every time! In my opinion the most important thing that all parents can do is to support their child’s desire to, “do it myself.” We all hear, “I want to do it myself,” I am guessing daily for parents of a Primary age child. This need for independence is normal, healthy and a great opportunity for us to help the children build their confidence. With confidence comes the willingness to take on more and more challenge, setting the foundation for all learning, academic and personal.

     The purpose of many of the activities in one section of the classroom is to directly instruct how to care for ourselves and how to care for our environment. For example our Dressing Frames isolate one difficulty each: buttoning, snapping, buckling, tying, etc. This is so that the children will be prepared to fasten their own clothing. The other day I gave one of our new students a lesson on buttoning and at the end when I invited her to button the buttons she said it was, “too hard.” I told her that she, “can do hard things.” She worked again with her little fingers to push and pull the button through its hole and persevered. She smiled. Sure that she could handle her work on her own I walked away. A few minutes later she tracked me down on the other side of the room and beamed, “Teacher- look!” Each button was buttoned and her smile was glorious.

     At home I encourage you to support your child’s independence in every way that feels possible- letting them put on their own shoes, zip their own coats, pour their own cereal, help to pack their own lunches, and cut up their own apples with a butter knife. When we have confidence that these tasks can be accomplished even a wary child will often try, borrowing our confidence in them until their own is developed. Confidence turns into independence. Once independence is incorporated into your child’s personality it will help them along the way as they grow, eventually allowing them to be self-sufficient adults. It can be difficult as adults to step back and allow the children the time and space to do things themselves. Our lives are busy and our efficient, logical minds are telling us how much more quickly we could get all this done and it is very tempting to take the reins.  Sometimes it means building a little more time into the mornings, which I know is not easy, but the proud look on your child’s face will be well worth the effort.